Home from School & Sibling Fighting Starts

school-bus-topKyle arrived back from his first day of school at 3 p.m. He punched his sister at 3:05 p.m.  At 3:06 p.m, I made the connection.

Kyle’s aggression directly coincides with going back to school. Brooke and Kyle certainly have their less than friendly moments but in this case there was no provocotion on Brooke’s behalf. In fact, she was asking him what he had for lunch.

Last year, when Kyle started kindergarten, I saw the same kind of negative attitude towards his sister during the first few days of school. I have some theories on this:

1) He could be jealous of Brooke. She only has to attend preschool three days a week…and in his mind, I must be with her while he’s at school. (Not true, I’m at work).

2) The school bus ride could rev him up. I mean, have you been on a school bus lately? It’s loud, kids are obnoxious, and it probably smells. When Kyle walks off the bus each day, I swear he is in a daze that takes a few minutes for him to get out of. Maybe his aggression is just an overflow of bad school bus energy.

3) All day, he has to follow rules. He has to sit at his desk, listen to the teacher, go to this class, sit this way, etc. He may see his little sister as someone he can “boss” around. Finally, he has some control.

In truth, all of my theories could apply. The question is how to handle them.

I’m going to have to try a few things. Maybe I’ll make sure he can be active when he gets home – ride his bike, throw around a baseball. My point is allow him to let go of some of that negative energy.

Two, I’ll try to get some alone time with him. Talk about his day, play a game or just listen to any stories he wants to share. Even if that can’t happen right when he gets off the bus, I’ll squeeze in 10 minutes at bedtime. Maybe, our time together will lead to him sharing some of his feelings (he could prove one of my theories right)

Three, there is never an excuse to punch his sister. Period. There will be a consequence if that type of behavior continues. My job is to get to the heart of what may behind it.

Wish me luck.

– Heather

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